


Too Late To Apologise

by ShootMeDead



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: BAMF Pepper Potts, Break Up, Epic Bromance, Gen, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, Protective Jarvis (Iron Man movies), Protective Rhodey, Warning: Irregular Updation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-22
Updated: 2017-05-31
Packaged: 2018-05-15 13:48:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5787508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShootMeDead/pseuds/ShootMeDead
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An Avengers Fic </p><p>The one where Steve is not a goody goody person who does no wrong, Tony is an awesome guy who won't break down, Pepper and Rhodey are the best besties anyone can possibly ask for, with other characters showing a good side.</p><p>Or </p><p>The one in which Stony happened before, and it WON'T happen again.</p><p>Title from Apologise by One Republic</p><p>Edit: Title changed from 'Tell Me That You're Sorry' to 'Too Late To Apologise'</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Apologies

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Don't own Avengers 
> 
> The fic has been cross posted in my wattpad account : GoShootMeDead

Tony Stark was a genius.

His mind was always so fast, so quick to analyse, deduce and understand, while creating things beyond an average man's imagination. He was a scientist, who played with possibilities and probabilities on a regular basis. He reveled in unravelling mysteries and finding the answers to questions that no one can even comprehend.

So, he should have known what was going to happen. He should have seen the signs, should have _known._

Maybe he did know, in a deep corner of his mind that echoed with the voices of his past, chanting, _'you'll never be enough, never, never, never'._ But, it was buried under layers of wishful thinking that, _'_ _maybe, just_ maybe _, this time it'll be different.'_

Needless to say, Tony was shocked when Steve came to him with a small smile, as he always did, (which was, in hindsight, more like a grimace, and atleast _that_ should have clued him in) when Tony was geeking out in the lab and said, "I'm so sorry but, I can't do this anymore, Tony."

Though he didn't show any outward reaction indicating his surprise, he was running through all the things he had done that might have driven Steve Rogers away.

_'What stupid thing did I do this time? Must've been serious, for such a drastic action. Oh god, Pepper is gonna kill me.'_

Though, he never once considered the possibility that it might not have been his fault at all. That thought didn't even cross his mind, because the voices from the deep corner of his mind had grown louder ( _his father screaming at him that he was a disappointment, always breaking everything; Obie laughingly telling him, with a mocking glint in his eyes, that he never could make anything good in his life to stay; the silence of Pepper and Rhodey that screamed of disappointment, even though they never said a word to that effect)._

Therefore, Tony was left gaping (in his mind, obviously, because he was Tony _f_ _ucking_ Stark, and he doesn't gape like a brainless oaf), when Steve revealed the reason for the breakup to be Steve himself, or rather his inability to let go of his past.

"I'm not over Peggy yet, Tony, and also, you remind me too much of Howard that I can't - I'm so sorry."

Tony didn't trust himself to speak since he wasn't sure that if he opened his mouth, he wouldn't, either, verbally flay Steve or plead with him to reconsider.

 _'It's not my fault,'_ he reminded himself.

Tony nodded stiffy, his eyes blank.

Steve shifted on his feet and looked as though he wanted to say something more. But then he closed his mouth, and with another painful grimace, left the lab.

Tony didn't know how long he stood there, lost in thought.

When he finally became aware of his surroundings, he realised that DUM-E was whirring soothingly near him, and all the holograms he was working on were shut down.

"JARVIS?" he asked, clearing his throat.

"I've called Miss Potts and Colonel Rhodey, sir," the AI answered promptly. "They'll be here shortly."

Tony nodded, absent-minded. He felt disconnected.

He moved towards his stash of scotch.

"Well, I think I deserve a drink or ten after _that_ ," Tony said, gesturing vaguely towards the lab entrance.

DUM-E whined sadly.

"Sir, please," said JARVIS, soft but firm. "You have only now started to leave behind the habit of drinking. Please don't let that _man_ be the reason for your relapse."

Tony stopped on hearing the tone of distress in his AI's voice. Taking a deep breath, he changed directions and shuffled towards the worn couch instead.

"Alright, J," he said, reassuringly. "Whatever you say."

As he laid down, the lights were dimmed and the silence wad broken only by the chirps of his bots. He felt tired and wrung out.

He knew that Pepper and Rhodey would come as soon as they could- they always did. It was a tradition, almost, that whenever one of them faced an upheaval, the other two would drop everything to be with each other.

Tony knew that he would have to tell them what had happened. He would have to analyse and catalogue it properly when he was ready to think clearly; though, he's pretty sure that Pepper and Rhodey would be very vocal in unashamedly placing all the blame on Steve bloody Rogers. They were his best friends after all and it's kind of in the job description to always side with him.

But that was later.

For now, all he wanted was to sleep for a long while, hoping that when he woke up that the metaphorical heavy weight over his chest would have, at the very least, lessened.


	2. Pepper's Fury

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Phone Call - Part One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Protective!Pepper ahead!

**  
**

Pepper was having a good day.

She had been successful in closing an important deal, and also, she was wearing brand new boots which totally rocked (it was Tony's selection, after all). She had a promising date with a charming guy who _didn't_ irritate her within minutes of the conversation, which she considered a win.

So, as stated before, Pepper was having a very good day.

That was until she got a call from Jarvis. Just two sentences, and there went her good day.

_"Miss Potts, you are needed at the Tower. Colonel Rhodes has already been notified."_

Instead of the happy feeling she had a minute ago, she was now filled with overwhelming concern, worry and a simmering rage.

Not at Tony, _never at Tony._ Rather, it was directed at whatever had led to _the_ phone call.

Pepper could count on one hand the number of times both Rhodey and her had received such a call from Jarvis, and she would still have most of her fingers left. But the times she _did_ get the call were... Well, bad would be a severe understatement.

Even though Pepper and Tony hadn't worked out romantically, their brief period of dating had only strengthened the bond between them. She had always been a bit of a mother-hen. And right now, all her protective instincts were flaring up.

Though she felt a passing regret for cancelling what might have been a lovely date, one part of her mind was already working on plans for damage control and for wrecking utter havoc on The Cause, while the other dreaded the state in which she'll find Tony.

As she made her way out of the office, the employees jumped out of the way on catching a glimpse of the foreboding, and frankly terrifying, expression on her face.

While dealing with enemies, Tony was cold and ruthless, Rhodey was cunning and calculating, but Pepper, she was vicious and very effective.

They could take over the world if they wanted to.

Pepper gritted her teeth.

To the public, they maybe CEO, Iron Man and a Colonel, but first and foremost, they were family.

They were _her_ family.

And she was going to tear apart  _anyone_ and _anything_ that messed with them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rhodey's reaction and thoughts are next!
> 
> Let me know what you thought about the chapter!


	3. Rhodey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks a bunch to everyone who has given kudos and dropped a comment!

Col. Rhodes was filled with a sense of awe, like always, whenever he was facing the Stark Tower. It was a technological marvel and a physical representation of Tony's work. And as always, Rhodey's awe was followed by a wave of pride for Tony.

Rhodey happened to be Tony's oldest friend. And so, he had seen Tony in all his highs and lows.

_When he first met Tony Stark in University, Rhodes had been cornered by a bunch of kids coming from high-profile families. Rhodes was head-strong and he would have gladly thrown himself into starting a fight if it weren't for the fact that he had entered purely on merit and could be expelled while the others would just pay off the institution (Money was everything, after all). Not to mention, he couldn't stand to see his mom's sad face._

_So, there he was, resigned to getting a black eye, a split-lip and some derogatory terms thrown at him, when there was a whistle._

_"Wow, can you guys be anymore cliché? Seriously? Ganging up on one guy? For what, exactly? His lunch money?"_

_It was a posh, and arrogant voice which practically screamed,_ I am better at everything and I know more than you do.

_Rhodes could only watch, shocked, as his tormentors fell over themselves to explain and placate the newcomer. The newcomer who, incidentally, was wearing designer clothes, shining new shoes, and sunglasses, was looking at the boys with a sneer and a displeased expression. But Rhodes saw how his eyes flicked over him quickly, checking for any injuries or such._

_What followed was a snarky tongue-lashing, which led to the boys running off with their metaphorical tails tucked between their legs._

_"You alright?", asked the guy, running a hand through his hair. Anyone else would have thought it was a show-off move, but Rhodes recognized it for what it was, a nervous gesture._

_"Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks for stepping in, by the way," said Rhodes, smiling._

_The guy seemed to relax._

_"They won't bother you again," he said. Rhodes wasn't sure, but he thought he heard him mutter, "If they knew what's good for them."_

_Rhodes' smile widened. He extended his hand._

_"James Rhodes."_

_"Tony Stark." They shook hands._

_Finally, a name. Rhodes was getting tired of calling him 'the guy'._

_"So, Rhodey, can I call you Rhodey? I'm sure everyone else calls you James, so I'll just give you my own nickname. Do you like coffee? I sure could go for some coffee. I know this place down the next street, and let me tell you their muffins and pies are to die for."_

_And so, Rhodes became Rhodey. As Rhodey walked along Tony, bemused by the rapid-fire way of Tony's talking, he couldn't help but feel he had made a new friend._

Throughout the University, Tony and Rhodey had become close friends. Rhodey found that Tony threw himself into things with everything that he was, and he felt things with his whole heart and soul.

Rhodey was the one who gave Tony encouraging words whenever Tony would deflate, remembering the harsh words of his father (Howard Stark'd better be thankful that he hadn't met with Rhodey. If he had, only one would have walked away from the meeting, and three guesses as to whom, while the first two doesn't count).

Rhodey was the one who took care of Tony when he tried to drown himself with alcohol to make his brain shut up.

He was the one who held Tony when he broke down wondering  _what did I do wrong, why does my dad hate me, why can't I do anything right._

Rhodey was also the one who met Jarvis, who was Tony's father in all the ways that matter. He saw the pride and love for Tony in Jarvis' eyes, and his own heart ached.

When the news of the accident reached Tony, Rhodey saw his best friend's world collapse. Rhodey helped him through it, never wavering, forever a pillar of support.

The media, like a pack of rabid wolves, pounced on the grieving Stark Heir. And it was then that Rhodey saw the many masks of Tony Stark being created to hide him from the world and the walls that he built around his heart.

Unfortunately, when Tony let Obadiah Stane run the company in his stead, Rhodey had to go across the world for his training. He kept in touch, though. Of course he did. This was his damaged, yet strong like nothing he had ever seen, brother. He wasn't going to just up and leave.

And when they finally met again, the hug that followed was for both of their peace of minds, really.

Rhodey was introduced to JARVIS, Pepper and Happy. He was glad that there were people (and an AI) who cared about  _Tony_ and not _the Tony Stark._

When Afghanistan happened, Rhodey searched tirelessly, employing all his resources, all the while screaming inside his mind, _oh god please please be alive I'm going to find you Tony I swear to god oh please don't give up please just please I can't lose you._

Finding Tony on the lab floor, looking like death warmed over, Rhodey was pretty sure his heart climbed to his throat. And it stayed there till the whole fiasco was done with.

Then came the palladium poisoning. When Rhodey heard the truth, way after the whole thing was over, it was all he could do to keep from crumbling in horror of what he had done. He hadn't been with him when Tony had needed him. He had _betrayed_ Tony by taking the Iron Man suit. His best friend had been _dying,_ and Rhodey had been caught up in his own drama, and _Jesus Christ!_

It was like a weight had lifted off of him when Tony forgave him. But these events had only made Rhodey more protective over Tony, even though he knew Tony can take care of himself.

He planned with Pepper, who was hysterical on learning about palladium poisoning, and gave specific instructions to JARVIS on what to do on any event. This was when, Rhodey and Pepper got their next shocking surprise.

JARVIS was more sentient than an AI was supposed to be.

If it were anyone else, they would have been scared out of their wits. But as far as Rhodey and Pepper were concerned, it was one another person who will look out for Tony.

Then came the aliens, and all Rhodey could think was, _what on earth!!??_

And once again, Rhodey had to watch as his best friend risked his life.

In the end, a bunch of people, whom Rhodey didn't trust fully, had moved into the Stark Tower and renamed it as Avengers Tower. He saw the footage of what happened in the Helicarrier, and it didn't sit well with him when Tony started dating Steve Rogers. But Rogers seemed to make Tony happy, and as long as Tony was happy, Rhodey was fine with it.

That morning, when he saw the alert on his phone from JARVIS (he had gone out running), he had had a bad feeling. But he shoved it down and took off like a bat out of hell to the Tower.

It was a good thing he had eaten some food. He had a feeling that he might need to break someone's face.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, this escalated quickly.
> 
> It wasn't supposed to be over 1.2K, but heck, Rhodey just wouldn't stop. 
> 
> If you guys find any mistakes, grammatical or otherwise, do let me know.
> 
> Kudos and comments are always welcome. Tell me what you think, since it helps me write :)


	4. Sleepover + Pizza

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhodey and Pepper come to know what exactly happened...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My wholehearted thanks to everyone who has read, given kudos and taken time to leave a comment. You guys rock!
> 
> As always, if you find any mistakes, do let me know! ;)

While waiting for the elevator, at the Stark Tower, Pepper was joined by none other than Rhodey.  
They did not speak but they did exchange a look filled with apprehension and worry.

JARVIS automatically took the elevator to the floor of Tony's lab.

On reaching the lab, it was hard to say who was more surprised, Pepper or Rhodey. The lights were dimmed, only a faint whirring sound of machines was heard.

"JARVIS?" Pepper spoke, softly.

"Yes, Miss Potts?"

"Where's Tony?"

"Sir is currently sleeping in the couch at the back of the lab," JARVIS said.

Rhodey frowned.

"Tony never sleeps during the day. What happened, JARVIS? Whatever it was, it must have been serious if Tony actually locked up the experiments."

"While it is indeed correct that something serious happened, it is only a part of the reason why Sir to retire," said JARVIS, smoothly. "He hasn't slept in 36 hours."

Of course, JARVIS had no qualms in throwing Tony under the bus in regards to his two best friends, if it meant he would take more care of his health.

"He, what?" Pepper fumed.

Rhodey didn't say anything but it was obvious that he was _not_ pleased.

If it was possible for an AI to feel smug, JARVIS would have, at that moment.

"As for what happened, maybe you'd like to watch it yourself," JARVIS activated a monitor and started playing the security footage, without waiting for a reply.

There wasn't a single sound from both Pepper and Rhodey throughout the entire viewing of the footage.

When it was over, both of them turned to look at the other.

Pepper's face was white with fury, her eyes glittering sharply. Rhodey wasn't much better. He kept clenching his hands into fists, while gritting his jaws hard enough to make his teeth ache.

"I am going to kill that _bastard_ _,_ " Pepper hissed.

"Not if I get to him first," disagreed Rhodey.

"But first-"

"Tony." Rhodey nodded.

"JARVIS, order Tony's favourite pizzas, and line up the most scientifically inaccurate movies ever," said Pepper. "I'm _not_ letting him mope over a, a-"

"A douchebag," filled in Rhodey, amused.

"That! And come on, we are having a sleepover today."

Rhodey grinned. Revenge can wait another day. Tony came first.

_Family always comes first._

"It's done, Miss Potts," interjected JARVIS. "Sir will take great delight in watching these movies." His voice sounded amused.

Rhodey again wondered if maybe JARVIS had more sentience than he seemed to. It was always possible. His creator was Tony Stark after all.

Pepper went to the common kitchen to see if she could find some ice cream.

Rhodey looked around till he found Dummy.

"Hey," he whispered. Dummy chirped at him.

"Wanna come to the sleepover? I know you're worried about him, too."

Dummy whirred, excited.

Rhodey chuckled and walked over to where Tony was sleeping. A small, gentle smile turned his lips. The eccentric genius looked peaceful and so much younger without any strain lines covering his face. Rhodey only then realised just how long it has been since he saw Tony look carefree.

Oh, he was happy, or rather, _had been_ happy, when he was together with Steve, but even then he was always under pressure. It was not easy being an owner of a multi-million dollar company, a superhero, the spokesperson for the Avengers, and the guy who worked on various projects.

Rhodey knew that Pepper helped him as much as she can. But even then it wasn't enough.

A sigh escaped him.

_Tony, you idiot. Why won't you ever ask for help? It's okay to share your burdens, why don't you realise that?_

Rhodey shook him gently.

"Tony, hey, come on, wake up."

Tony mumbled something, swatted away Rhodey's hands and went right back to sleep. Rhodey thought he looked adorable, but would never tell him that. He liked to live without looking over his shoulder constantly, thank you very much.

After much wrangling and grumbling, Tony woke up, pouting and glaring. It was an odd combination, but he made it work.

 _Of course he did,_ thought Rhodey, laughing internally.  _He's Tony Stark._

He saw the exact moment Tony remembered what had happened with Steve. Tony's eyes became blank, not before Rhodey caught the amount of pain and confusion he tried to hide. His brows furrowed and he looked tired. Rhodey was filled with an almost overpowering need to  _hunt that_ _asshole_ _down_ for making Tony feel that way.

He kept calm, somehow, keeping that rage under tight lockdown. He didn't become a Colonel by letting his emotions rule him.

"Pepper is taking over today," Rhodey let out a dramatic sigh. "We don't have a choice. We'd better obey her or she's going to resort to drastic measures."

The shudder that went through both of them was very much genuine and was filled with horror. Just thinking about the last time Pepper took _drastic measures_ was enough to make them cringe and wish fervently that it never happened again.

"Yeah," Tony echoed, pale-faced. "Let's go."

Elsewhere, Pepper was on the phone.

"So, can I count on you?" Pepper asked, her face looking as though it was carved from granite.

" _Of course, Lady Pepper,_ " a voice purred, in her ear. " _It will be my genuine pleasure._ "

"Good,"she said, curtly. She let out a breath, lifting her other hand to massage her temple. "Thank you, Loki."

She could visualise the shark-like grin on his face.

" _Please, don't mention it, Lady Pepper. Anything for dear Anthony._ "

Pepper snorted.

After cutting the call, JARVIS informed her that Tony and Rhodey were on their way to the penthouse.

"Oh, and JARVIS?"

"Yes, Miss Potts?"

"That was a great idea to call Loki for help," Pepper gave a wicked smile at the hidden camera at the corner of the room.

"I aim to please, Miss Potts," said JARVIS, drily.

Pepper laughed as the elevator opened to show her two boys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys liked the chapter! Tell me what you think! I love hearing from you guys.
> 
> Also, I am kinda losing inspiration for this fic. I am NOT gonna abandon it, so don't panic. But I would love to hear some ideas. The thing is, I am not satisfied with what my mind is coming up with and I dunno, I just don't like it. 
> 
> So, I need you guys to help me out. 
> 
> Thanks you adorable people! :)  
> )


	5. The Next Morning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What the title says...  
> And FLUFF!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any mistakes present are mine. If you find them, please do let me know. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who has read, given kudos and taken the time to comment.

Tony wasn't sure what had woken him up. He was very comfortable where he was, surrounded by warmth. Not the stifling kind but the safe, homey kind of warmth.

For a moment, he wondered if it was Steve, but he knew it couldn't be him. Due to the serum, Steve's body ran at a slightly higher temperature than normal. It wouldn't have been a problem but it was, since Tony had a higher body temperature too, due to the arc reactor.

Tony kept his eyes closed and breathed deeply, or as deeply as he could with the arc reactor lodged in his chest, basking in the comfortable sense of belonging.

 _Rhodey_ _..._

Of course it was his best friend. Tony smiled. His eyebrows furrowed when he caught another familiar scent.

_Pepper..._

His smile widened. Opening his eyes into slits, he saw that the both of them had taken their places on either side of him.

Pepper had her hand on his tee, right above his arc reactor, her head nestled on his shoulder. Rhodey was on his left, facing Tony and Pepper, curving his body protectively towards them, legs tangled with Tony's.

Tony knew that Rhodey and Pepper loved him. But it was little things like this, when even in sleep they made sure to keep him close, always touching at one point or other, that enforced his belief that whatever happened, he will always have them by his side.

Of course, thinking about them made him think about why exactly they were there with him. He acknowledged the constant, dull ache in his chest while remembering that he had lost another one whom he had loved.

The previous day, when Steve had broken up with him, Tony had been plagued with doubts and the feeling that he would never be enough.

It didn't last as the cavalry had arrived sooner than he would have thought, by the courtesy of JARVIS.

Pepper and Rhodey had quite thoroughly hammered it into his head that he was not at fault. He was pretty sure that there were post-it notes, graphs and charts involved at some point or other.

They had made it into a sleepover, ordering pizza and takeout and just indulging themselves while watching movies the whole night long.

Though Tony rarely said it aloud, he knew that he was so very lucky to have them in his life.

Pepper shifted and nuzzled his neck.

"You're thinking too hard, Tony," she mumbled. "Sleep."

She patted his chest to enforce her order and drifted off.

Rhodey made a sound of amusement, making Tony glance at him. Rhodey was blinking at him with sleepy eyes, his mouth curved up in a fond smile.

It was an agreement made in the beginning that whenever it was just them, Rhodey and Tony, there would be no masks between them and that they'd be their real selves with each other. When Pepper had come into their lives and earned their trust while becoming their close friend, the agreement had extended to include her.

"How long have _you_ been awake?" Tony asked, surprised.

Rhodey smirked.

"Not too long. The sound of your brain whirring woke me up."

Tony scoffed, giving him a mock-offended look.

Rhodey observed him, eyes bright with a hint of concern.

"You okay?"

Tony glanced away for a moment, remembering the previous day. Looking back, he nodded.

Rhodey didn't push.

"Pepper needs her coffee when she wakes up or she's going to make us suffer."

Tony huffed out a laugh. He knew how true that statement was.

Rhodey got up from the bed and went over to the door, squeezing Tony's shoulder.

"JARVIS, is anyone in the kitchen?"

"Yes, sir. Miss Romanoff and Mr Barton are preparing coffee. Would you like me to alert them of your impending arrival?"

"Yes, please. I don't want to deal with two wary assassins when I haven't even woken up fully." Rhodey yawned, rubbing his hand over his face. He slowly shuffled out of the room.

Tony glanced down at Pepper's fiery red hair and tightened his arms around her, holding her close. He decided to doze off till the caffeine arrived.

* * *

Natasha Romanoff was one of the best assassins in the world. Being exceptionally observant was kind of in the job description.

When her quiet morning routine with Clint was interrupted by JARVIS announcing Colonel Rhodes. She exchanged a glance with Clint.

_Well, this was new._

She watched as a drowsy Colonel walked in, wearing  _sweatpants_ of all things. Rhodes tossed them a cheery greeting and made three perfect cups of coffee while still blinking sleepily.

It didn't escape her notice that though he was not very alert, he still made sure to check the room before entering.

Natasha wondered why Rhodes had come over and judging by his attire, had apparently slept over too.

It was no secret to Natasha and Clint that Rhodes did not like Steve Rogers.

Natasha was there when Pepper had shown the footage of the disagreement between Stark and Rogers, though she always wondered how Pepper had gotten that footage.

She saw the absolute rage that had filled his eyes and made him clench his fists lest he break something or someone's face. Pepper wasn't any better. Her eyes were ice-cold, standing out on her pale face, glittering with anger.

Clint knew about this encounter because she had told him. He was her partner and so obviously, he knew.

When the news about Stark and Rogers dating had reached them, Pepper had just given a tight smile while hiding her worried frown. Rhodes had given his well-wishes but his visits to the Tower had dwindled considerably.

So, seeing him back at the Tower confused both Natasha and Clint and made them wary.

The three of them made small talk while waiting for the coffee to be prepared. Neither Natasha nor Clint pushed for answers as they had a feeling they would know sooner or later. Probably sooner.

After Rhodes had gone, carrying with him the three coffee cups, Natasha faced Clint, eyebrows raised.

"Looks like Pepper is here too," mused Clint.

"I wonder what happened," said Natasha.

Clint shrugged.

"I'm going to the gym for a while. And later, I'll head out and visit that bakery you have been eyeing for a while. Be careful."

He pressed a kiss to her forehead and on receiving the small smile that she reserved only for him, he headed out.

Natasha watched him go. She had always said that love was for children. But looking at Clint, she didn't know what to think.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A hint of Clintasha for you guys. 
> 
> Drop me a comment coz reading them inspires me and overall makes me very happy.
> 
> Also, fun fact: 
> 
> When I first had the idea for this story, I was planning on making Tony get together with someone better. And I actually had already decided on that person. It was none other than... Bruce Wayne. 
> 
> I was kinda obsessed with WayneStark fics (still am, tbh). And I really liked that idea. 
> 
> But then as I started writing it, I felt like Tony was awesome even without any romantic partner. 
> 
> What do you guys think I should do?
> 
> I am up for either. Let me know of your thoughts... <3


	6. With Friends And Family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cookies and thanks to everyome who read, reviewed and gave kudos. You guys helped me in writing by giving me encouragement so, thanks a lot! <3
> 
> If you find any mistakes, please let me know! :)

"So...," began Rhodey.

 Both Pepper and Tony glanced over at him, over their coffee mugs. Rhodey wondered how Pepper still managed to look immaculate while Tony looked like an adorable, bedraggled cat. But he decided to keep those thoughts to himself. He wouldn't put it past Tony to throw his mug, coffee be damned, at him.

"I think it would be better if Tony lets the team know of what happened yesterday," he made a hand gesture that probably looked rude rather than explanatory.

A fleeting look of amusement passed over Tony's face before the words sunk in.

"What? No," Tony denied, vehemently. "Why should I? It's none of their business anyway! Pepper, back me up on this."

Rhodey glanced at Pepper. She looked to be considering the pros and cons of the suggestion. Both Tony and Rhodey had seen that expression on her face before, often during times of crisis or any business deals. That was when the ruthless CEO came out to play.

"Actually, Tony," Pepper began, slowly. "Rhodey's right."

Tony gave a loud gasp, giving her a betrayed look and clutched at his chest dramatically. It didn't hide the uneasiness or the reluctance in his eyes.

Both Rhodey and Pepper understood why he wasn't eager to keep his team in the loop.

Since his birth, the media had been hounding him. It came with being a Stark. It only got worse as Tony slowly grew into a genius and his every action was talked about and criticised by everyone.

Tony Stark became the media's darling. People loved him and loved to hate him. He was under constant scrutiny, the media waiting for him to fall, to crash and burn. After all, he was just a reckless, filthy rich, wild guy who couldn't handle his genius. But of course, Tony being, well, _Tony_ , wouldn't be himself if he didn't turn their expectations upside down, set fire to them and danced on their ashes. He rose up and above every restriction, tearing through the expectations like they were napkins, and flaunted it to his adoring public.

The public thought they knew him but they didn't.

Not really.

They didn't truly realise just how _little_ they saw of the real Tony Stark and that too only because he deemed it acceptable. Only a precious few, chosen after great deliberation, were ever allowed a glimpse behind the carefully constructed, heavily maintained masks he wore almost constantly.

Regarding his reluctance to confide in the team, Rhodey and Pepper knew that though Tony was a part of the Avengers and they were his team, he didn't fully trust them. Oh, he trusted them to watch his back in battle. But with his secrets? That'd be a resounding ' _NO_ '.

It was hard to trust people after facing betrayal too damn often, especially from people who had his trust.

_Damn Obadiah Stane to the deepest pits of hell._

It was a wonder that he still had it in him to trust at all. The ones he did place his trust in, like Rhodey, Pepper, and Happy, cherished it and endeavoured to never break it.

Pepper placed her hand on Tony's arm and squeezed gently, letting him know that she understood his misgivings.

"It is better to give them the whole story now instead of letting them speculate. Speculation leads to misunderstandings and that is a whole disaster just _waiting_ to happen," Pepper said, grimacing.

Rhodey nodded.

"Despite being superheroes, the team always was overly interested in your relationship."

Tony flinched at the word 'relationship'.

Rhodey wanted to gouge Rogers' eyes out and shove a burning rod up his nose. Pepper looked like she was contemplating the efficient ways to hide a dismembered body.

"And if we don't give them the truth," Rhodey said, hiding his murderous thoughts. "They might come to erroneous conclusions. It's better that they hear it from you directly."

"And we all know whom they'll blame for this clusterfuck," Tony interjected, bitterly.

That was when Rhodey and Pepper got new targets for their fury. A single look between them was enough. They understood each other perfectly.

If any of the Avengers did _anything_ that could potentially hurt Tony, they'll be in a world of pain since Rhodey and Pepper were two people who considered Tony Stark as their top priority and took his wellbeing, both physical and mental, very seriously.

Tony sighed forcefully, jumped out of the bed and clapped his hands.

"Well, I'll just get this over with now, then."

He turned on his heel and walked to the elevator. Pepper and Rhodey were right behind him.

"Breakfast first, Tony," admonished Pepper.

"Fine," Tony pouted. "Then, I'll face the wolves."

"Uh, no," Rhodey said slowly, as though talking to a small kid, mostly because he knew how much it irritated Tony. "We'll be right there with you. You aren't doing this alone, man."

Pepper nodded emphatically, as her heart broke a little. Even after everything that had happened, Tony still expected them to leave him.

Yeah, no.

 _Not happening, Tony,_ Pepper thought, determined.

Maybe Tony finally realised that, because the smile that bloomed on his face was small but genuine, bright, and full of awe.

And _that_?

To Rhodey and Pepper, that was _everything_.

* * *

Bruce Banner was searching for his tea. The others needed caffeine to come alive, but Bruce and coffee were a terrible combination. After all, no one needed a caffeinated Hulk running around New York, wreaking havoc.

As soon as he found it, pushed to a corner of a cabinet, he exclaimed, "Finally!"

"Hey, Brucie!"

Bruce very carefully controlled his breathing. Turning, he gave a bland stare when he noticed Tony giving him an expectant look.

"Sorry to disappoint, Tony. But no Other Guy today," Bruce deadpanned.

"Shame, really," Tony said, grinning.

Bruce narrowed his eyes. There was something... _off_ with Tony. That was when he noticed how Tony didn't make any eye contact and kept fidgeting.

Before he could ask what was wrong, because he knew that something was indeed wrong, two people whom he didn't expect entered the kitchen.

"Pepper, Colonel, good morning," he greeted, confused.

"Rhodes is fine," came the assurance.

Bruce nodded and turned to Tony.

Even though Bruce sought to be in the shadows, out of the limelight, he could be considered to be more observant than he was given credit. He understood the nuances of the body language and learnt to interpret their thoughts and desires from the little things. That was what had kept him safe from Ross and others who sought to obtain Hulk as their weapon.

He was wary of the Avengers in the beginning. He still was, to be honest. But Tony had given him a place to stay and encouraged him to turn it into a home.

After weeks of working together on any project in the lab, Bruce had learnt many things about the guy who had opened his home to him. And he liked what he saw.

Bruce considered Tony as his friend and much to his surprise, so did Hulk. Though if he really thought about it, it wasn't surprising at all. Tony was the only person who wasn't afraid of the Hulk. If anything, he considered Hulk as a person, someone who was in no way beneath anyone else.

So, seeing Tony being nervous and looking tired and resigned to something was enough to raise his metaphorical hackles. The Hulk grumbled at the back of his mind, sensing that something was wrong.

He vaguely wondered why Tony was accompanied by Pepper and Rhodes, instead of the Captain, but chose not to comment on it.

"Are you alright?" Bruce asked, frowning. "What's wrong?"

Tony tried for a smile but it looked more like a grimace.

"I'd rather tell it to everyone in one sitting, Bruce," Tony said, apologetically.

Bruce just gave a small nod, but his worry didn't dissipate.

"Blueberry pancakes?"

Tony smiled. It was dimmer than usual but, it was a smile nonetheless. Bruce would take it.

"A man after my own heart," Tony said, still smiling.

Bruce and Rhodey chuckled as Pepper shook her head fondly.

Bruce set the kettle for his tea and started making breakfast.

"JARVIS, call an unofficial Avengers meeting within this hour," Tony said.

"Of course, sir."

"And now, we wait," Rhodes said, in a low voice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt like this chapter was dragging quite a bit and I'm not quite satisfied with it. But I'm still counting it a win since I finally posted it!
> 
> And, I thought, with time, my fierce rage towards the venerable Captain (note my sarcasm) would diminish but, nope! Thinking about CACW still makes my blood boil. Someone kill the guy, please.
> 
> Let me know what you thought of the chapter and what you would like to see in the forthcoming ones. If there's any particular interaction you want, let me know and I'll try to incorporate it.
> 
> Kudos and comments are appreciated! 
> 
> Btw, what fanfics are you guys reading now? Me, I'm delving into Star Trek currently ;)


	7. The Hawk's Viewpoint

When Clint decided to skip gym and go directly to the café, he didn't expect to see Steve Rogers there.

As a spy, he always made sure that he wouldn't be in a very visible spot. He knew how to blend in and make it so that the people's eyes slid right past him. He wouldn't be a spy if he didn't know _that_.

So there he was, eating a chocolate cupcake with rainbow sprinkles on it _(shut up, it was a guilty pleasure)_ , while sitting in an obtrusive corner, with his back to the wall and having a perfect view of the entire shop. If anyone were to look at him, they'll see an ordinary and _extremely_ bored guy who was minding his own business.

It was at that particular moment, when he was licking frosting from his upper lip, Clint caught sight of the Captain entering the café. Normally, Clint would have called him to share the table but that day, something was a bit off. The assassin narrowed his eyes as he took in Steve's body language.

_Nervousness, eagerness, undertones of guilt..._

Clint watched as Steve walked over to a waitress. She was pretty, he supposed _(she paled in comparison to Natasha)_. Steve ducked his head and spoke with her, looking at her from under his eye lashes, with a shy smile on his face. The girl blushed and smiled back at him like an adoring fan. The realisation hit him like a runaway train.

Steve was _flirting_ with her.

_Steve_ was flirting with her.

All Clint could think was, _but what about Tony?_

Clint, by reading their lips, knew that Steve had asked the pretty blonde out on a date _(you're already in a fucking relationship, what the fuck, Steve?)_ , and she had accepted. He couldn't blame her. She looked like an innocent person and anyway, who _wouldn't_ fall for the American icon when he batted his lashes and flashed his baby blues?

Clint Barton didn't have much friends. The only ones whom he could call _his,_ the ones whom he _knew_ had his back, were Phil and Natasha. For a long time, it was only them against the world. But then, the Avengers came into his life and Clint was wary about trusting them. They were a bunch of strangers with whom he was expected to work. And he had learnt his lesson about trusting strangers _(never trust them, not unless you want to wake up with a knife to your back and a slit throat)._

Tony Stark was the first person who made Clint feel welcome. He barged into Clint's space and made himself a part of it, regardless of Clint's wishes. They bonded over weapons, cars and pranks, even though the scientist was capable of pushing all his buttons. He later realised that it was Tony's own brand of testing and he respected that.

The point was, before Steve, Bruce and even Thor, it was Tony who earned Clint's friendship and trust _(not full trust of course, that was reserved only for Nat and Phil)_. It was understandable that the archer felt a bit protective over the billionaire. He knew that Nat cared, in her own way, for him too, though she'll gut anyone who mentions that. He also knew that Tony was head over heels for Steve Rogers, who appeared, for all purposes, to be two-timing his friend.

Clint would have confronted Steve right then and there if it hadn't been for a chirp from his Starkphone. It was a message from JARVIS requesting him to assemble for a team meeting. It appeared like Steve hadn't received the message or, if he had, he was ignoring it in favour of his new... interest. Clint took the bag of pastries he had bought previously and slipped out of the café, while pondering on the latest developments.

The question was, should he or shouldn't he get Natasha's help in eviscerating Rogers?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter. My mind's kinda empty nowadays and all I could do is read more fanfics, hoping that it'll kickstart my brain, instead of preparing for my exams as I'm supposed to be doing. 
> 
> Also, if there's anything you guys want to see/ be included in this fic, let me know in the comments. I'll try my best to incorporate it into the story. And hey, who knows, maybe the space between my two ears will activate. 
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated.


	8. Out In The Open

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know if you find any mistakes.  
> Thank you for all the kudos and comments!

Natasha Romanoff can safely say that she did not see that coming. Oh, she guessed that Tony and Steve would break up. But she had been of the opinion that it would be Tony who would break things off, not Steve.

When Tony had announced that Steve had chosen to cease their relationship, Natasha had immediately wondered what Tony could have possibly done that had earned such an extreme reaction. Pepper Potts gave her a quelling stare as though she knew exactly what Natasha had been thinking. Clint shifted slightly at her side, his arm brushing against hers, giving her a focus to anchor her thoughts.

Natasha's eyes widened, before she brought her surprise under control, when Tony admitted what had been Steve's excuse for ending their relationship. She analysed his body language and his tone of voice and realised that he wasn't lying. If anything, he was baffled and hurt beyond measure, and it was obvious in the way he leaned microscopically into James Rhodes and Pepper Potts, who had situated themselves on either side of him, giving him unspoken yet solid support.

"We wouldn't want anyone to have any sorts of misconceptions on the break-up," said Pepper, with a pointed glance at Natasha. "So, we decided it was better to let you all know now."

Natasha gave a respectful nod to Pepper. She had been wrong, she acknowledged that.

"So, yeah," muttered Tony. "I'll probably be in my lab."

Tony paused on his way out and glanced at everyone assembled.

"JARVIS," he said, slowly. "Why isn't Cap here?"

There was a pause.

"I'm afraid the Captain did not receive the call for assembling, sir," said JARVIS, smoothly.

Tony raised his eyebrows.

"And why is that, J?"

"Network connectivity problems," was the succinct reply.

Tony left the room, snorting with laughter, the cloak of sadness lifted for a moment.

As soon as Tony disappeared and was out of hearing range, Clint fidgeted.

"I saw something before I got the notice from JARVIS," Clint began, his face inscrutable.

It was hard to say who looked more furious, among those gathered, after Clint had divulged his information.

Bruce's eyes were an animalistic green and the same green was creeping along his veins. He was desperately taking calming breaths. Rhodes went over to him, disregarding how close the man was to hulking out, and placed a calming hand on his shoulder, all the while murmuring words meant to soothe, even though Rhodes himself was anything but calm. Pepper's fists were balled up so tight that her knuckles had turned a sickly white, and her lips were compressed into a very, very dangerous, thin line. She appeared to be plotting the best ways to eviscerate the good Captain. Natasha would probably, _most definitely_ , help her.

Tony Stark had willingly, fully knowing what it meant, had exposed himself to Natasha during his disastrous birthday party, when he was dying from palladium poisoning. Later, after the alien invasion in New York, when both Clint and Natasha had formed a temporary home-base at the Tower, Tony had admitted that he had known who she was. Maybe not everything, but enough to know that she wasn't whom she had said she was, to know that she had been some sort of a spy.

He had taken a gamble, fully knowing that it might be his downfall, and that had shaken her to the core even though she did not show it. She suspected that he knew it regardless.

In response, she gave him company during those nights when insomnia struck him and the night was _too_ quiet that it felt like the silence was _shrieking_ and pressing upon him, when he felt like he was back in that dark cave in Afghanistan, in the middle of nowhere, and the water was rushing at him, filling his mouth, his nose, and his lungs, robbing him of his breath and choking him, and the sickening coppery tang of his own blood weighed on his tongue as his throat tore over and over because of his screaming _nononONOIWILLNOTsomeonehelppleaseNO_.

So, she filled his nights with her humming of long-forgotten Russian songs, that had once been sung to her by someone who had once been important to her, before her life had been filled with shadows, blood and death. And whenever it was too much for her, whenever Clint had been on missions, and the darkness yearned to have her in its grips, Tony filled her nights with equations and formulae, interspersed with Italian songs that had been laced throughout his childhood.

Clint understood, of course. At times, whenever both the spies were off missions, he would join them and all the three would stay together, up all night, keeping each other company, a show of solidarity against the unspoken terrors of the night. During those times, the silence would be filled with selective, wistful, humorous memories of the past, usually in Clint's baritone.

So, after all these late nights, Natasha had counted herself among those few who _knew_ Tony Stark, and was secretly quite protective of him. To realise that she had slipped back into her old mindset, when confronted with a choice to place the blame on either Tony or Steve, deeply unsettled her.

Natasha exchanged a look with Clint and turned to face Pepper.

"We'll get the info on the girl."

Pepper gave a grim nod.

"Since Tony and Rogers' relationship was public knowledge," Pepper said, her eyes gleaming. "A statement has to be released. It would be too bad if pictures of Captain America having an illicit affair went viral before the release."

Rhodes and Bruce outright gaped at her, admiration and a fair amount of fearful awe in their eyes. Natasha's respect for the CEO went up several notches. Clint gave a sudden cackle.

"Brilliant!" Clint exclaimed.

"I'll stay with Tony," said Bruce, a thoughtful frown on his face. "He'll... need us."

"I'll keep _him_ away from Tony," Rhodes declared firmly.

After an unanimous agreement, everyone went their separate ways. Rhodes and Pepper went to say goodbye to Tony and instructed JARVIS to call them if Tony needed them. Clint and Natasha decided to drop by SHIELD HQ. Bruce went up to the roof to do some much-needed meditation.

And JARVIS cut the video feed streaming to a separate screen.

"Well," Loki said to himself, mildly. "This changes the original plan."

He closed the laptop with a snap, his face a picture of serenity, while his eyes glinted a dangerous red, and the air around him literally froze as the temperature dropped to sub-zeros.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year 2017! Let's hope this year won't kick our asses like 2016 did. *crossing fingers*
> 
> Kudos and comments are so very welcome. If you wish to see anything in particular in the story, do let me know. 
> 
> Also, guys, check out the comment section of this story, if you would like to read some frank and awesome opinions of some amazing people (I'm counting you among the amazing people too, regardless of whether or not you have commented).
> 
> Another IMPORTANT note: I'll be posting a Tony Stark/Bruce Wayne (Truce or WayneStark) oneshot sometime later. The whole plot is in my mind. All I need to do is type it out. So, keep an eye out. 
> 
> Take care and have a wonderful day!


	9. Ice That Burns

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the kudos and reviews. You guys rock! 
> 
> Sorry for the late, so very late, update. I don't want to give excuses. But I can give the reassurance that I will NOT abandon the story. This or any of my other works.
> 
> If you find any mistake, please let me know.

  
It was not just gratitude that Loki felt towards Anthony Stark.

Of course, gratitude was a given. After all, Anthony was the one who had _listened_ to him patiently and attentively, without any judgement. When Loki had escaped to Midgard, after the Allfather Odin had sentenced him to imprisonment without even asking for his side of the story, it was Anthony who had tracked his location. It was Anthony who, on finding a numb, despairing Asgardian _(not even that, a monster, I am a monster),_ had offered his help.

Loki did not know, at that time, why the mortal who had suffered much at Loki's hands would want to help him. He would not know till much later that it was because Anthony had looked into his eyes and had seen a kindred soul.

If there was one thing that Loki had learnt after centuries of experience, it was to never place one's trust in someone, no matter how trustworthy they appeared to be. Trust only leads to betrayal and heartbreak. It was better to keep yourself above it all, aloof and seemingly heartless.

_After all, how could a heartless person experience heartache?_

But, after being in Anthony Stark's presence, Loki knew that if there was one person, _just one_ , in the entire cosmos whom he could trust, other than Frigga, it was Anthony. Upon hearing the truth about Loki being enslaved _(Loki did not want to tell the truth. He did not want to appear weak to a mortal. But after suffering for eternity in a place where time had no hold over, in the grasps of the Mad Titan, being forced to stay alive as his mind unravelled over and over again as his body was torn apart and his magic, entwined with his life force, was twisted to do unmentionable deeds, all Loki wanted was to let go. And he did, under the sympathetic gaze of Anthony, which told him that there was someone who understood, someone who will not judge him for giving in to his torturer, someone who has felt the same burning black rage that's coiling within Loki, just waiting to be unleashed on the ones who had wronged him),_ Anthony had given him a place to stay, kept him hidden from the others, with the exception of Pepper Potts and Colonel Rhodes.

And, slowly, Loki had healed. It may take years, centuries even, before he could be atleast a part of what he was before. But, right then, he was not alone. And that was all Loki needed to recover.

So, no. Gratitude was not the only thing that Loki felt for Anthony Stark.

Loki _trusted_ him. And, even though Anthony did not even suspect, Loki considered the genius to be firmly under his protection. On being introduced to Pepper and Rhodes, Loki had realised just how much Anthony was loved. They were two people who would storm the very gates of Helheim to protect their family, for that's what he was to them _(An acute ache blossomed in his chest as memories of ages past came to his mind, of Loki and Thor being brothers before Thor began to take his little brother for granted, of Odin giving Loki a rare look of pride (oh wait... that never happened), and of Frigga, sweet Frigga, the one person who had loved him always)._

Loki respected Pepper and Rhodes. And he was secretly delighted when they considered him a friend _(after threatening to destroy him if he ever hurt Anthony)._

Therefore, was it any surprise that Loki had become furious on hearing about how Anthony had been hurt?

The Aesir knew that emotional hurt was so much more potent than any physical hurt _("... no, Loki...")._ For the esteemed Captain to behave so callously, was unforgivable.

Loki briefly entertained the idea of just dropping Rogers in Muspelheim. After all, people went missing every day. It would not be a big deal, would it?

Ah, well, Anthony would definitely disapprove.

He knew that he could not do the things he would have done if it were Asgard, instead of Midgard. But... _but,_ he _could_ make Rogers' life very, _very_ uncomfortable.

A wicked grin flitted across his face for a moment, before it was hidden behind a neutral, composed mask.

It was time for The Trickster to live upto his name.

* * *

 

Steve did not like to hurt people and he did not like it when people were hurting needlessly. That said, he felt a bit uneasy about the way he had broken up with Tony.

Using Howard as an excuse made Steve cringe. It was a flimsy excuse. He half expected Tony to call him out on it. But Tony had just looked blankly at him, a look of hurt and disbelief masked as soon as it appeared. Steve doubted that it had even appeared. But whenever he thought back on that moment, an unknown pressure exerted itself on his chest. He did not understand what it was, and so disregarded it. It did not occur to him, not even for a single moment, that he had carefully neglected to examine the true reason for his breaking up with Tony.

Steve turned his thoughts to the lovely girl from the café. She was really pretty, and it was obvious that she adored him. The way her blue eyes widened in awe every time she looked at him was clue enough.

_Somehow, his mind kept replacing the awed blue eyes with soft, affectionate, golden brown eyes._

Shaking his wayward thoughts out of his head, Steve went to his room in a happy daze, oblivious to the tension and the carefully hidden hard looks on his team mates' faces. If he had... that would have been a different story altogether.

When Steve went to sleep that night, he did not observe how the room's temperature dropped several degrees. He did not notice narrowed green eyes gazing at him from the dark, as he sank deeper into sleep. He certainly did not notice as the green bled into cold red, reminiscent of the eyes of a demon.

His dreams that night were filled with his memories of his time in the ice, the sub-zero temperature freezing the air in his lungs and the blood in his veins. No matter how much he struggled, Steve could not break free from the terrible, terrifying cold that pulled him into deep waters.

A pattern of ice on the floor of the bedroom remained till the early hours of the next morning.

* * *

  
_**Muspelheim: one of the Nine Realms.** _

_**'Located above Asgard is Muspelheim, a world that is bathed entirely in flames and is home to many beasts that manifested from the fires.'** _  
_**\- Marvel Cinematic Universe Wikia** _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Loki escaped after his trial. Thor 2 did not happen. Frigga did not die.
> 
> How was the chapter, btw?  Liked it? Hated it? Looooved it?
> 
> Whatcha think about Loki's thoughts? And Capsicle's? Looks like someone's not as over Tony as they thought... oops.
> 
> Also, if there's anything you'd like to see in the fanfic, let me know, and I'll see if I can incorporate it into the story. No promises, though.
> 
> And, dunno if I already said it, but my Tony Stark/Bruce Wayne fanfic, 'Dark Paradise', is up. Has been for ages, actually. Check it out!

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I've always wanted to write an Avengers fic.
> 
> DON'T READ THE BELOW NOTE IF YOU ARE OFFENDED BY SHAMELESS HONESTY
> 
> And I gotta ask, am I really the only one who doesn't like Stony? I don't understand it's appeal, to be honest. I don't like Captain America either, though I am sure he has some qualities that might redeem him of his self-righteous assh*le like behaviour.
> 
> Let me know what you guys think.
> 
> My tumblr: [wonderwheremysanitywent ](http://wonderwheremysanitywent.tumblr.com)


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